The Habit Worth Keeping

As I wrote last week, my dear friend Kitty and her husband were in a horrific car accident in December, with Kitty receiving the brunt of the injuries. It is now three months later, and although she is not fully recovered, she is back in her home in Brooklyn and rebooting her life with an enthusiasm and zest for life that is remarkable. I like to think of it as she's having her very own Persephone Rising moment!

Kitty is a very close friend and I've always been so grateful that our paths crossed 20 years ago. We've had a myriad of adventures and I know that our lives will be intertwined forever. As I was reflecting on our friendship and how happy I was that she made it through, my thoughts went directly to that feeling of gratitude and how important it is to have in my life. I've written about gratitude before and I think it's always a worthy topic to revisit.  

Today, I’m writing about gratitude — on what just happens to be the 2nd Anniversary of Persephone Rising. As we roll into the spring season and hopefully leaving this dreary winter behind, I just wanted to take a beat and acknowledge my own gratitude and remind you of the important role it plays in each of our lives. 

In the Science of Getting Rich, Wallace Wattles wrote, “The grateful mind expects good things. The grateful mind is constantly fixed on the best, therefore it tends to become the best, it takes the form of the best, and will receive the best.”

Gratitude has been proven by over 40 research studies to have long-lasting and wide-reaching impact on all aspects of life. Gratitude is strongly associated with improving mental health, but it improves our physical and relational health as well. Being grateful also impacts our overall experience of happiness and contentedness — outcomes that tend to be enduring.

A few of the benefits of being grateful are:

•    Increased optimism and contentedness
•    Decreased negativity, stress, and depression
•    Improved connections with others
•    Heightened self-confidence
•    Increased energy and positivity
•    Strengthened immune system and other health benefits
•    Enhanced ability to forgive others

When someone is not grateful for something coming into their life (thinking to themselves, “It’s about time,” or “I can’t accept that dinner, or gift, or generosity”), they are living in a space of constriction and very contracted energy that ultimately comes from a lack of deserving. Gratitude is the vibrational flow and expansion that increases our sense of deserving.

In The Power of Gratitude, Kevin Eikenberry wrote, “Gratitude is an attitude. Gratitude is a choice. And gratitude is a habit. When we consciously practice being grateful for the people, situations, and resources around us we begin to attract better relationships and results. The habit will be strengthened as you make the choice each day.”

This is the 77th post on Persephone Rising — two years almost to the date of the first post (March 21, 2017). If you had asked me then if I thought I'd reach the two-year mark, I would probably have said, "I'll be surprised if I make it to September, let alone two years." But here I am, still plugging away at it, with a few breaks taken for sanity purposes 

This blog was one of the big goals that I accomplished in 2017. It has definitely been a challenge. But more importantly, it’s been an amazing learning experience. It’s taught me discipline, it’s helped me focus and dig deeper into my thoughts and life philosophies, it’s expanded my skills as a writer, and it’s allowed me to express myself in a completely new and different way. And for that, I am truly grateful.

My hope is that this attempt to bring a different perspective of life through Persephone Rising has been and will continue to be beneficial for you — or at the very least, interesting enough for you to keep reading it. For me, though, it has made me even more thoughtful and aware of my own self, of the life that I’m leading, and of the life that I want to lead in the future.

Let me leave you with one small action step to get you into the vibrational flow of gratitude. Just before you go to bed tonight, write down two or three things that occurred today. It might be something as small as a receiving a compliment from a stranger or as big as landing a huge promotion. Whatever it is, be grateful.

Each and every day is a gift, filled with discovery and surprise. By expressing our gratitude for all of the beauty, wonder, and good fortune every day offers, we invite happiness, joy, peace, kindness, and fulfillment into our lives. Now, who wouldn’t want that?


Cooking for Joan

Today’s recipe is a classic dish my mother used to make for us every once in a while. If I was given a choice between meat and potatoes or a one pot saucy dinner, I would always choose the latter. (Not that my mother ever gave us options!). But when I was attending college in Lake Forest, I had free rein.

The cafeteria usually offered up two options — some form of meat and starch or a mystery pot of who knows what. I always went for the one pot wonder. My friends always ribbed me for being the “slop” eater in the group. But, on occasion, the “slop” was the best choice. In any event, this chili is far from “slop!” It’s simplicity of ingredients lends to a delightful meal — warm, homey, and totally satisfying. I’ve made a few adjustments to the recipe. Enjoy!

 Mom’s Chili with Beans


 Prep Time: 30 min | Cook Time: 1 hour 30 min | Makes: 6 to 8 | Difficulty: Easy


  • 2 tablespoons vegetable or corn oil
  • 2 cups onions; chopped - cut into 1/4-inch pieces
  • 1 cup bell pepper; chopped (red, yellow or green) - cut into 1/2-inch pieces
  • 2 tablespoons garlic; minced (or pressed through garlic press)
  • 4 tablespoons chili powder
  • 1 tablespoon Ground cumin
  • 2 teaspoons Ground coriander
  • 1 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
  • 1/2 teaspoon Cayenne pepper
  • 2 1/2 pounds ground beef, pork, veal
  • 2 (15 ounce) cans red kidney beans; - drained and rinsed
  • 1 (28 ounce) can (fire roasted) diced tomatoes - with juice
  • 1 (28 ounce) can tomato sauce salt pepper


Heat oil in a large Dutch oven medium heat. When oil is shimmering, add the onions, bell pepper, garlic, chili powder, cumin, coriander, pepper flakes, oregano, and cayenne. (Dry seasonings are added at the beginning with the onions so the spices release their oils and the vegetables have enough time to absorb all the flavors.)

Cook the mixture, stirring occasionally, until vegetables are softened and lightly colored, about 10 minutes.

Increase heat to medium-high, add the meat and lightly season with about 1/4 teaspoon salt. Cook, breaking up the meat with a wooden spoon, until no longer pink and just beginning to brown, roughly 4 to 5 minutes.

Add beans, tomatoes and their juices, tomato puree, and about 1/2 teaspoon salt. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat to low and simmer, covered, for 1 hour, stirring occasionally.

Remove lid and continue to simmer for another hour, stirring occasionally, until meat is tender and chili is slightly thickened (if chili begins to stick to bottom of pot, stir in 1/2 cup water and continue to simmer). Taste and, if necessary, adjust seasoning with salt.

Remove from heat and serve, or refrigerate, and serve the next day. To serve, ladle into bowls, and top with your favorite condiments.


If you're a fan of spicy food, try using a little more of the crushed red pepper flakes and/or cayenne — or maybe add a couple seeded and diced jalapeno peppers. The flavor of the chili improves with age. So, if possible, make it one to three days in advance and reheat before serving. Leftovers can be frozen for up to a month.

 bon appétit!


Categories: Relationships - Personal Interactions

Tags: life coach , life coaching , relationships , power of gratitude , being grateful , Science of Getting Rich , The Power of Gratitude , self-help articles , understanding gratitude , chili with beans , chili recipe , homemade chili